The Family Education Training Center of Hawai`i

Who Are We?

The Family Education Training Center of Hawaii (FETCH) is a University of Hawaii-based affiliate of the Family Education Centers of Hawaii , a non-profit, 501 (c) (3), charitable organization. FETCH coordinates volunteer professionals and service-learning university students to provide services to families under stress. We believe people learn best by working in teams and providing services for others, so service skills are incorporated in all youth and parent programs.

Our team consists of: 2 licensed psychologists, a licensed clinical social worker, a parent educator, four graduate assistants, 20 university student counselors-in-training and three high school student technicians.

In a 10-week session each semester, FETCH provides parenting education, counseling, and four programs for youth, ages 2 to 18. Programs are on Sunday afternoons from 4:30-7:30 p.m.. There are two 10-week sessions of FETCH throughout the school year. Parents attending all 10 meetings in a session receive a program completion certificate.

What are Our Goals?

The purpose of FETCH is to provide all members of distressed families with the skills they need to work together to restore family harmony and enhance adaptation.

Our goal is to teach family members the skills they need to set up and
maintain a smooth-running family. Parents learn how to organize the family,
distribute family work, and elicit the cooperation of all family members.
Parents learn how o communicate respectfully and effectively. Family
members learn how to set rules and routines as a group and what to do if a
family member fails to follow the agreed-upon rules.

All family members, regardless of age, learn to contribute to the
well-being of the family. In turn, all members are given a voice and have
input into family decisions. Adequate planning, mutually respectful
communication, and voluntary cooperation by all members prevent parents
from feeling the need to control children in angry, autocratic ways.
Parents learn neutral ways to communicate respectfully with their children.
The learn how to control their anger, to interpret their children's actions
more accurately and to respond to misbehavior more effectively.

What do we want?

We want:

• families to be harmonious, nurturing and productive
• family conflict and parent-child power struggles to become dynamics of the past
• children to contribute responsibly to the family
• parents to respect and listen tot heir children
• each member to feel s/he has a valued place in the family and an effective voice
• family member to trust and show respect toward each other
• family members to think first in terms of “we” rather than “I”
• each person to contribute to the family to his or her ability and to take from the family in relation to his/her need
  

We help parents and children gain skills in:

• Self-reflection and understanding
• Goal-clarification
• Respectful communication
• Active listening
• Conflict resolution
• Group organization and leadership and
• Ways to belong in groups through contribution
  

What goes on at a FETCH Parent Meeting?

At the beginning of each parent-education/counseling meeting an experienced parent educator gives a PowerPoint lecture on topics such as how to:

• organize a smooth-running family
• communicate respectfully and effectively
• understand the goals of children's misbehavior and
• respond effectively to misbehavior.

Parents then meet in break-out groups to discuss how to apply these methods to their own families.  Professionals circulate to provide input into these discussions.  Parents and staff eat a buffet meal while discussing.  A counselor elicits input from the groups to determine families' main themes.

After dinner and discussion, two licensed counselors counsel a set of parents who have volunteered to discuss their family in front of the group of parents.  This is called “open forum” counseling.  The counselors interview the parents to understand the family, its members and the problem.  They then tailor suggested methods to fit that family's situation.

The counselors interview, first, the parents, then the child(ren) to understand the family situation, strengths, and problems. They give therapeutic suggestions, tailored to fit that family's situation and needs.

Family members return home to apply these methods. Counselors briefly re-counsel the family the next week to assure a good fit of these methods with that family.

What do parents learn at FETCH?

Parents learn that the key to successful parenting is to have an effective road map of the terrain.  Parents learn five major guiding principles.  These are that it is important to:

• Identify the goal of your child's maladaptive behavior
• Guide the child to use more adaptive behaviors to reach that goal
• Use encouragement rather than criticism or praise
• Use natural and logical consequences rather than punishment or reward
• Use family meetings to involve children in decision-making and to elicit their cooperation.

While parents meet in the Art Building Auditorium, children participate in age-specific programs in Miller Hall, next door.  The Youth Program staff train children in how to contribute responsibly to their families and to other groups.  Children learn how to understand and control their emotions, communicate respectfully and resolve conflict.  The purpose of FETCH is to get all parts of the family system to work well together.  Toward this purpose we train all members of the family in the same sets of skills. 

Please look below for links to program descriptions.